Friday, the 13. March, changed my life and the lives of my family abruptly. On this day, were adopted in in Bavaria due to the Corona pandemic, visit bans for care and old people’s homes. Today on the morning we were not allowed to see my father. We had to say goodbye six weeks later, from him, I should never have believed. So we would have his birthday on the 28. April with him celebrated. It was his dying Day.
my father was not in the last few years particularly well, was clear to all of us. Me, my mother and my three siblings. But it was not to him so bad, even though he had been struggling for years with his Parkinson’s disease. The medication helped him to get through the day.
And my mother helped. She was the main support for my father. She has cooked for him, cared for him, him to the toilet accompanied, with him laughing and him walking is no longer pushed, as the Run went at all. But, eventually, your power. Ten or even fifteen years, my mother had cared for 24 hours – around the clock – my father.
A full-time job out of love and connectedness
Our family house sold my parents at an early stage and at an age-appropriate apartment in the outskirts of Munich exchanged. That was a good decision that has helped my mother day in and day out, because recently, everything my father has turned. A full-time job for my mother: without breaks, without vacations, without pay. Out of love and connectedness! S. Hennig (private) Irmi and Eduard T. on the day of your wedding Ceremony in 1961 in Munich
at the end of last year, my mother has realized that she needs a break. You no longer can, and at the end of their forces is reached. The physical exertion has you overwhelmed, increasingly, and grief was wide: “What’s more, if I can’t?” or “Who will take care of Edi?” were the questions which they employed. We kids have noticed and noticed and open with our parents talked about it.
“If you want I’m still here, then we must do so.”
In the fall of 2019 was clear: dad’s home in a care. As it was, it was more because my mother was on the verge of collapse. So what already had been for months in the air, said my mother at last: “If you want I’m still here, then we must do so.” And even though she had my father to constantly have a bad Conscience, agreed on both a temporary accommodation in a short-term care.
Three, four weeks, a break from the daily loading, take a deep breath and recharge your batteries, so the Plan of my parents was. However, at home it turned out in the care that it is not more at home would be to go. The limitations of my father by the Parkinson’s disease had been disease – and the burden for my mother.
From the short-term care to the seniors home
at the beginning of my mother breathe a sigh of relief: The physical burden of the daily care of the deeds of other, and even if the distance between my parents was both very painful – you have arranged it well.
My mother regularly went to the nursing home and my siblings and I visited my father as often as it went. Okay, a young whippersnapper he certainly was, but the television has he loved, and our visits kept him going. The prospect of my mother or us in a few days again, gave him strength and courage. So our visits have always ended with the same question: “when are you coming back?”
And he liked eating together and socializing with other residents, as he loved friendships, treasures, family, feasts and football club: 1860 Munich. As long as he could, he drove into the stadium at the green forest road. And he warms up in the home of “his Irmi”, with the he in the summer in the 60. Year been married would be.
Then, the Corona-crisis
In March, certain, suddenly, a Virus of our life, and on a Friday, the 13th, was adopted due to the Corona-pandemic for the home of my father, a ban on visitors. From today morning my mother and we are no longer to my father, were allowed. No visits, no contact, no meetings with people from the outside.
loneliness brought my father to the death
On the 24. April rang the bell at my mother’s the telephone. An employee of the nursing home called and said, my father was in a “palliative Situation.” Hit six weeks, had suffered from my father at this time under acute loneliness.
of Course, has taken care of the staff well to him. But they are just nurses and nurses and not wives, daughters, sons or grandchildren. You do your Job and deserve the greatest respect and better pay. But they are not family and you can’t replace.
As my parents have seen for the last Time, my father said that he had a dream that my mother had died. The ban was the day before the Contact. Maybe he has lived the last six weeks of his life in the consciousness that he had to follow her.
My father died on his birthday
On the 28. April 2020, my dad died. In his 83 years. Birthday. Sure, you can say that but that’s okay. Others die much sooner. That’s right, too. But my father didn’t have to die. He didn’t bear it to be alone. He has to eat after five weeks of loneliness ceased to drink. He was not able to continue to live.
The loneliness did not survive my father. He didn’t understand the Virus and the measures associated with it. He didn’t understand why his loved ones are no longer allowed to visit him and him alone.
I could have three days before my father died, to remember him, to say goodbye. In these situations, special arrangements for nursing homes were. But he was already so weak that he could no longer speak with me. I have him playing specially prepared sound recordings of my children, his grandchildren pre. It helped in the end, nothing more. “He didn’t survive Corona – though he had no reason to.”
The Text is based on a conversation with the daughter of the deceased, and FOCUS Online editor Julia Kerner.
“you spread germs!”: A nurse is in the supermarket, evil, FOCUS Online/Wochit insulted “you spread germs!”: A nurse is in the supermarket evil
insulted jke/
