On his last big football mission as Bayern coach, Thomas Tuchel has to deal with Uli Hoeneß’s legendary attack department. The heavy criticism from his own ranks not only hurt the 50-year-old Tuchel’s “coaching honor”, but also really annoyed him about the 2-1 (1-1) against Eintracht Frankfurt before the Champions League spectacle against Real Madrid.

“There are ten incredibly important days for all of us. There is no worse time for any sideshows,” said Tuchel. Especially since he has to worry about “miracle healings” given the injuries to Jamal Musiala, Leroy Sané and Co. “There are now ten days in which everything is at stake,” emphasized the football teacher.

The warm-up for the semi-final first leg on Tuesday against the Royals, with Harry Kane already in Real form against Frankfurt, faded into the background in light of the next trouble for the Munich coach. To stick with Tuchel’s image of the apartment on a noisy street with annoying neighbors, Hoeneß’s words must have sounded to him like blaring heavy metal music from his own living room in the middle of the night.

Müller amuses with a Kahn parody

During a public appearance, club patron Hoeneß criticized Tuchel’s work in developing young players. The “accusations” were “miles” away from reality, countered Tuchel, who once promised Hoeneß to “take good care of his club.” Thomas Müller settled the dispute with a successful Oliver Kahn parody. “I don’t give a shit,” said the national player in an apt “Titan” tone. Kahn coined the famous sentence more than 20 years ago after a 2-0 defeat in Bremen.

Immediately before the premier class classic against the Royals from Madrid around Toni Kroos and Antonio Rüdiger, sports director Max Eberl was relieved that the noise was at least not hindering his own team’s last chance to win the title. “The team showed that it doesn’t affect them,” said Eberl.

He spoke to both Hoeneß and Tuchel at the weekend. “My job is now to calm things down a bit, channel the fire properly and then beat Real on Tuesday,” said Eberl.

Eberl: Let’s see whether Rangnick agrees or not

After less than two months in office, Eberl is experiencing a highly intense time in the “club that apparently interests the entire nation.” “I don’t think it’s FC Hollywood,” said Eberl in the turbulent days at Bayern with the constant question about the commitment of Ralf Rangnick as Tuchel’s successor. “We have top trainers with whom we have dealt with. And now let’s see whether Ralf Rangnick accepts it or not.” No decision will be announced by the club before the first leg against Real on Tuesday (9 p.m.).

“It feels like every two hours people are talking about this coaching search, commenting on it and discussing it. I’m excited to see when Markus Lanz finally gets involved in this whole topic,” joked Eberl. At the panel discussion in the “Frankfurter Allgemeine Zeitung”, 72-year-old Hoeneß commented on the search for a coach so far: that his wife Susi rated the stay of master coach Xabi Alonso in Leverkusen at breakfast as a strong character. And that we will see from national coach Julian Nagelsmann whether he was right with the DFB decision – depending on the outcome of the European Championship – or whether he made a mistake.

Tuchel wants “miracle cures”

After many injuries in the team, Eberl was confident that “almost everyone will be back on board” when they meet former Munich coach Carlo Ancelotti at the Allianz Arena. Musiala had to sit out against Eintracht due to knee irritation. Sané continues to suffer from painful pubic bone problems. Konrad Laimer (ankle capsule injury) and Matthijs de Ligt (interior knee ligament) joined the team on Saturday as new injured professionals. “We need a few miracle cures. We need a good bench, we need sporting weapons back,” said Tuchel, almost imploringly.

Munich’s biggest trump card is their attack. Kane celebrated a goal anniversary with the 400th goal of his professional career. With 35 league goals this season, Lewandowski’s record of 41 goals remains within reach. But that doesn’t really matter to the 30-year-old Englishman at the moment because he’s mainly hoping for “a few” goals against Real.

“I hope we can go into Tuesday’s game with confidence. Real are a fantastic team with a great history in this competition,” said Kane. “We have to think of something.” The goal remains the final on June 1st at Wembley Stadium in London.