Isobel Barnes and her husband Luke’s happiness was short-lived. Luke suffered from heart muscle disease and needed a transplant. But he did not get a new organ in time, in March he died at the age of 34 from multiple organ failure.
A shock for his wife, who was only 22 at the time. Isobel Barnes made the decision: she wants to live a part of the life that her husband was denied – by fulfilling his dreams. The young woman from Nottingham decided to work off a bucket list of places her husband could no longer visit. At the same time, she hopes that this will help her to deal with his death better.
After his death, she sold her house and booked a one-way ticket to Australia. For a few months she wants to travel the world in honor of her late husband. “No matter where I am, I mourn and I’m sad,” she says. “But I’d rather do that on the beach than at home in Nottingham. Luke wanted me to have the best life – I’m doing it for him too.”
Of course, this way of coping with grief is viewed critically by some. And Isobel sometimes feels “guilty if [she] doesn’t cry,” as she says herself: “But grief is complex.” The emergency doctor wants to be away for a few months and then return to her normal life – even if it will never be the same again without her husband. The couple met at work two years ago and married a year later.
Her journey is to take Isobel to Southeast Asia. “That would be what we would have done together,” she says. She doesn’t know exactly when she wants to return to England. In August she wants to return home for a short time, after which she will probably only fly back for Christmas. While other people retire after the loss of a loved one, she wants to enjoy life – and in doing so, inspire people to take a different perspective on grief. In addition, Isobel Barnes wants to promote blood and organ donations in light of her husband’s terminal illness: “The only thing I want to do for the rest of my life is make my husband proud.”
Sources: “Mirror”, “Daily Mail”
