This text comes from the stern archive and first appeared on February 4, 2023.
Ms. Liebrand, Ms. Gollan, many people would probably say: “Becoming a member of a cult, no, that could never happen to me.” Is it that easy? We would disagree with that statement. There is no one personality structure that is particularly vulnerable. It is more the living conditions or life crises that can trigger the need for protection, security or belonging and blind you to critical aspects. Sometimes you are desperately looking for a cure for a serious illness and come across dubious offers. By the way, we are talking about a conflict-prone community, not about sects.
The sect info avoids the term sect? The concept of conflict is crucial. Because what one person perceives as a conflict may be completely okay for the next person. There are people who are happy in a community because they need a predetermined daily structure. Strict rules help them make decisions and always know exactly what they are allowed to do and what they are not allowed to do. Many clients call us and say: I left a group and now I can no longer cope with my life. Many people suddenly lack a daily structure or no longer know what to believe.
The black-and-white thinking that they have learned prevents these people from coping in everyday life that is so clearly never possible? It then often represents a great challenge to make their own decisions. The often learned pattern that all people outside the community are evil and bad can initially prevent people from entering into new social relationships without being burdened. One of the big tasks after leaving is to regain confidence in your own judgment. At the same time, of course, this also promotes self-confidence: I can decide about myself again – what I want and what I don’t want.
At what point does a group of people become a conflict-prone community? There are many different aspects that are characteristic. We are often told about abuse of power. A very serious characteristic is of course fulfilled when human rights are violated. When sexual assault and violence occur. This is sometimes not immediately apparent to those affected.
How can that be? After an attack, those affected think: This had to happen now. To break the ego, for example – that is an explanation that is often used. Guilt is often a motive: I didn’t try hard enough, didn’t meditate enough, behaved wrongly, and therefore I deserved the violence. People in a conflict-prone group usually do not question the teaching and certainly not the guru. And that in turn does something to their self-esteem. These people are getting smaller and smaller.
In many cases, the guru promises the opposite: that you will grow, become taller, and see more clearly. That you belong to a community of initiates. Belonging is a very important point in these groups. People think they have finally found their community, a kind of family. Like-minded people who share their values and who, like themselves, want to change the world for the better. And they put up with a lot to fit in
Gurus are often said to have a special charisma. Where does that come from? We also know this in private life: Some people come into a room and have a certain presence. You can’t learn it, some people just have it. Narcissistic traits can also occur. Assuming someone is confident in themselves, can captivate others and says: I have secret wisdom, can heal, am enlightened – that doesn’t appeal to everyone. But it can be enormously attractive to those it appeals to. We are talking about a fit model, which is often the case: not every conflict-prone community fits every person. Life situation and your own biography are crucial. Someone is in a life crisis and is looking for a solution, support and belonging. And finds the supposed solution from a guru.
Do leaders of such groups sense which people are receptive to them? Yes, that is often the case. They are people who are looking for someone to tell them: This is right and this is wrong. One’s own sense of this is increasingly lost the further the leader’s exaltation progresses. Critical thoughts fall away as submission progresses. Spending a lot of money, pushing the sexual boundaries further and further – many of those affected tell us: I simply didn’t see it anymore, I was no longer objective. At the beginning there was perhaps a strange gut feeling, but the less I listened to it and the closer I was with the group, the quieter it became. A guru uses these gradual boundary shifts to his advantage.
Do gurus believe their own ideology? This is often the case. Legally, the question is actually important. If someone deliberately fakes something in order to cheat people out of their money, that is fraud. If the person himself believes in the mumbo-jumbo, it is not legally a deception. Over the years, many gurus convince themselves that they have certain abilities.
How? Maybe there was a lucky strike, a prediction came true, for example about a termination. Then this can continue to increase and at some point the guru believes in his own seemingly supernatural abilities. His ego also continues to grow due to the admiration he receives from outside. At the same time, gurus often get information about other members from many people: who is sleeping with whom, who has done what? The guru appears to be all-knowing, but remains vague. He doesn’t say: “Renate, I heard you cheated.” But he says: “Renate, I feel that you did something that was wrong.”
When we think of cults, we usually think of big names, groups that operate nationwide or even worldwide. To Scientology, to Jehovah’s Witnesses. It is very typical today that spiritual groups are becoming smaller and smaller. We call this “pulverization.” Small shared apartments that are set up, ashrams. A guru then sits there and decides about life, sexuality, career, everything. You don’t even notice it from the outside. Many groups also have a cover, concepts that work well on their own: ecological living, sustainability, physical culture, health, you only eat what you have planted. That sounds okay at first and can also be appealing to normal people. But when you look behind the scenes, you realize that something completely different is happening there.
What questions are on the minds of the people who contact you? There are people who have broken off contact with their family or have given up their job to work in an ashram. They then ask us: What can I do now? In other cases, it involves inheritance disputes or custody of children. Sometimes people call and say: My wife is in very esoteric circles and I’m worried. Relatives ask: How can I behave? How do I get my uncle or my daughter out of this group? Institutions also contact us. An example: A municipality wants to know whether a group that wants to rent a multi-purpose hall is dangerous.
Can you always provide information directly? There are groups where we know directly who it is about. But the market is now so pulverized, there are so many small healers, coaching and dubious offers, many thousands of names, that we often have to do our own research first. In general, we offer advice, are sworn to confidentiality and explain legal steps that clients can take. But it depends on the client whether he wants to go.
Do people have any claims for damages that they can make against the group or the guru? Often people want their money back. Have signed a coaching contract or paid money to a healer and are demanding it back. If someone acts as a healer but is neither a naturopath nor a doctor, they are not allowed to offer medicine. If he advises against taking necessary, doctor-recommended medication, he may also be liable for damages. Or people were exploited and worked for free. There are judgments where people have subsequently received money for their working hours. Then there are sensitive issues like sexual assault, which can happen in religious or philosophical communities.
But you’re not urging people to take legal action? No. We’re just clarifying. Some are stable and solid. Others say: “I’m just happy that I’m out of the group, I have to take care of my health first, stabilize myself. I have to get back into life and finish with the group.” Some come back to us after a while, after a year or two, and say: “At the time, you thought there would be an opportunity to get money back. I wasn’t receptive back then, but now I’d like to try.” We respect that.
Which cult-like groups are currently dominant? Conspiracy theories are still very much on our minds. During Corona times we had several of them on our desk every day. Speakers, motivational and personality coaches have used the pandemic to their advantage: “Everything is getting darker and darker, we’ve always said that.” But fundamentalist communities have also exploited the fear of such doomsday scenarios. And the offerings have been adjusted and people have increasingly switched to online courses.
Can you say how many such groups there are currently in North Rhine-Westphalia? Not really. There was once a study by the University of Bochum that estimated there were over 1,000 offers here in North Rhine-Westphalia alone. The scene can hardly be captured statistically. Something new opens today, closes again tomorrow. But you just have to visit an esoteric fair. And then you see what is on offer. Or look at the esoteric and life support section in the bookstore, which is often huge. That’s billions that are being implemented with self-help books and other aids.
Let’s say someone reads this interview we’re doing with you and wants to get in touch. How do you proceed? In moments like this, we try to maintain initial contact and convey to people that they can trust us. We keep all information to ourselves. If possible, we have materials or flyers sent to us so that we can better assess which group the people are or were in. So that we can give more specific advice. How many conversations or meetings take place and whether people would like to receive legal advice or, above all, psychological advice, we discuss all of this individually.
