So, I didn’t come all the way to Southern California looking for love. Nope, not at all. I was just completely exhausted. Burnt out, you know? Working crazy hours with a chronic illness, running those ultra marathons on the side, and dealing with the dating scene in New York that just made me feel even more invisible. It was rough, especially considering my childhood where my own mother called me “garbage” because of my eye condition that left me legally blind.
At 45, I was a doctor with autoimmune issues, a history of self-sabotage, and no clue about love. Intimacy was a foreign concept that scared the heck out of me. I could run 50 miles no problem, but a simple dinner date? Terrifying. Then one day, out in Laguna Beach in January, I tried paddleboarding for the first time. It was meant to be a chill activity for my weary soul. But then, out of nowhere, a massive gray whale named Molly appeared next to me. It was like she saw me, really saw me, for the first time in forever. And it hit me hard. I mean, I actually started crying. Yeah, I know, it might sound silly, but that whale changed something inside me.
After that encounter, I took some time to rest and reflect. I stopped trying to be what everyone wanted me to be and started to believe that I deserved happiness and belonging. And that’s when I met James. He wasn’t flashy or complicated, just a regular guy running a bike shop. And he didn’t play games or make me chase after him. Instead, he made me ginger tea. Can you believe it? He cared, listened, and showed up when I needed him the most, even when I pushed him away.
James and I were total opposites, but somehow, it worked. He embraced my food allergies and lack of cooking skills without hesitation. He even managed to whip up meals in my poorly equipped kitchen. And in moments of chaos and uncertainty, like during a power outage or a health crisis, he was always there, calm and unwavering.
We went through a lot together, including his battle with cancer, but James never backed down from any challenge or adventure. He supported me in my races and competitions, even though he wasn’t a racer himself. And when he started feeling my pre-race nerves, I knew something had shifted between us. I learned to let him in, to accept his love and support without reservation.
That encounter with Molly the whale taught me more about love and openness than years of therapy or endurance sports ever could. It showed me that true strength lies in vulnerability and being present. And thanks to that experience, I let go of the belief that love had to be earned through hustle and achievement. Instead, I found a love that was freely given and gratefully received.
James and I are still going strong after 15 years. Not because I changed who I was, but because I finally embraced my true self. And that, my friends, is the real power of love. It’s not about hiding or pretending; it’s about being authentically you. And that’s where the magic happens.
